Still...

Driving to work on Tuesday I was listening to the radio and CD's like always. I look forward to the time I have in the car ~ it's always a great time of worship and time spent with Him, mostly listening. It's always exactly what I need to hear.

Still
The more I get alone
The more I see I need to get alone more, more
Cause just when I think that I'm alone
Your Spirit calls out to me
And even silence has a song
Cause that's when You come
Sing over me

Still, let me be still
Let me be okay
With the quiet in my heart
Still, I want to be still
I'm so quick to move

Instead of listening to You
Shut my mouth
Crush my pride
Give me the tears
Of a broken life

Still

Of this world, it falls around me
And flutters all it's beauty in my eyes
But let me choose the solitude
Simplicity has always simply changed my life
Cause even stillness makes me move
Cause that's when my heart
Learns to dance with you (I love this...)

Still, let me be still
Let me be okay
With the quiet in my heart
Still, I want to be still

I'm so quick to move
Instead of listening to You
I'm your child
Tame my heart

Obedience
To me impart

Still
hold me
cleanse me
change me, oh God
Change me while I am
Still, let me be still
And know that you are God
And You're always enough

Still, I want to be still

To take all that I am
And simply lift it up
Shut my mouth
Crush my pride
Give me the tears
Of a broken life

Still... Still.. Still.. Still...

Word of God Speak
I'm finding myself at a loss for words
And the funny thing is it's okay
The last thing I need is to be heard
But to hear what You would say

Word of God speak
Would You pour down like rain

Washing my eyes to see
Your majesty
To be still and know
That You're in this place

Please let me stay and rest
In Your holiness

Word of God speak

I'm finding myself in the midst of You
Beyond the music, beyond the noise
All that I need is to be with You
And in the quiet hear Your voice

I'm finding myself at a loss for words
and the funny thing is it's okay

He reminded me that even when I am at a loss for words; which is most of the time, it's okay. So many times the words to the songs I hear become my prayer. And sometimes I feel like He is speaking these words just for me...

There Will Be a Day
I try to hold on to this world with everything I have
But I feel the weight of what it brings, and the hurt that tries to grab
The many trials that seem to never end, His word declares this truth,
that we will enter in this rest with wonders anew
But I hold on to this hope and the promise that He brings
That there will be a place with no more suffering

There will be a day with no more tears, no more pain, and no more fears

There will be a day when the burdens of this place, will be no more, we'll see Jesus face to face

But until that day, we'll hold on to you always

I know the journey seems so long
You feel you’re walking on your own
But there has never been a step
Where you’ve walked out all alone
Troubled soul don’t lose your heart
Cause joy and peace he brings
And the beauty that’s in store
Outweighs the hurt of life’s sting

I can’t wait until that day where the very one I’ve lived for always will wipe away the sorrow that I’ve faced
To touch the scars that rescued me from a life of shame and misery this is why this is why I sing

I am ready for "that day..."

I can remember years ago when I was grieving and healing over my past sin of abortion (Samuel and David) on my drive to work; though much shorter back then, if the radio became fuzzy (that happens alot when you live in the country) I realized He wanted me to speak to Him. I spent that time in prayer. Healing and grieving over how I had hurt Him...I spent that time speaking to Him, confessing, crying, confessing... It was a very healing time in my life. It was a precious time...

Now as I grieve for Rachel and slowly try to heal... I am realizing that I will never heal completely this side of heaven. I am also realizing that He wants me listening, really listening to Him. Whether it be in song, a word from a friend, walks in the park and the sounds of His creation or even just noticing the change of the seasons. He is always faithful to speak...

I am thankful for both seasons in my life. Both journeys, but especially this one, have lead me to become a better person with a stronger, deeper more centered and grounded faith. This journey has led me to a place where the joy is unspeakable even in the pain.