September 28...

September 28

When she was little she had a lot of funny things she would say... When she was learning to talk, one day she kept asking where is my a-ho? It took me a while to figure out she was trying to say Andrew. We worked on saying Andrew the rest of the day... thank goodness she learned that one quick.

My mom always taught me it was not ladyliketo dig in another lady's purse. I taught Rachel the same thing. One day we were in the the grocery store line and she started digging in my purse. I told her that it's not nice to dig in another lady's purse. She looked at me and said, "you not a wady you my momma." I thought the lady in line behind us was going to lose her dentures she was laughing so hard. My other favorite was when she would say "beff you! aka bless you." And if she sneezed she would say in a sassy sort of way, "wull, is anybody bless me?" One more favorite: She got in the car one day after school and said "momma, somebody said a cuss word... Judson and Colton Wall were with me and got very big eyed, thinking uh oh Miss Georgia is gonna get mad... She would not tell me what it was and would only say it was the "s" "h" word, when I finally got it out of her, it was "shut up." Andrew, Judson and Colton all three rolled their eyes as if to say, whatever...

I can still hear that sweet voice echoing in my ears... I miss her so...

the River...

The River...

Most of you know I went back to Heart O' the Hills for my camp reunion last weekend. While a difficult trip to make it was a good one. There was only a small group that were able to go, thanks to Ike but it was a sweet time of swimming in the river, taking siestas, milk line, ice cream at Jane's house, watching old camp film, sharing memories, singing songs and yes crying... As I sat on tribe hill I longed for Rachel to be there with me or at least have known that she got to experience the Heart as I had. I was reminded by a dear friend on the hill that she was there with us. She was sitting on her first Shawnee Hill and taking it all in just as I had as a little girl and now grown up. As I sat in church school overlooking the beautiful
last Sunday He gently reminded of my past, my present and my future as I watched the river quietly flow. Quietly flow, yet with life, fish swimming, turtles shyly peeking around and even a long skinny turtle (code for snake in the river) decided to swim by. HE quietly reminded me of my past as a camper and then counselor, my present as a woman of the King, a wife and mother... and yes of two, even if one of my children happens to live in heaven, and my future... not sure what the future holds for us. But I do know that if we keep relying on HIM it is going to be awesome. And right now we are really not thinking of the future we are still putting one foot in front of the other and following His lead.

It was 1975 the first year I attended there. I loved it. It was a place where I could be me, I could be a kid, a kid with no responsibilities other than myself and having fun and boy did I have fun. I went there until 1982 when I could no longer be a camper. And then worked two summers until I could be a counselor and then one summer as a counselor. My days there are a big part of who I am. I learned about truthfulness, goodness, purity, trust, faith, honesty, unselfishness and courage. I made lasting friendships. And I know that it is a place that brings me such peace and comfort and I am always welcome there. The feeling of diving in that water was incredible and you know how I feel about large bodies of water... that particular part of the river is wonderful... cool, crisp and refreshing... A part of me will always long for camp but I must face what is is my present and my future. As we were sharing favorite scriptures in church school a dear friend mentioned her favorite... it is the same one I have been hanging on to since I saw Rachel laying there on the stretcher in ER that night. I kept saying it over and over to her that night as Jesus came to take her home. I am clinging to it; although sometimes by a thread... "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11We do have hope and we do have a future...

Remember the times we’ve had here,
Remember when you’re away,
Remember the friends you’ve made here,
And don’t forget to come back some day,
Remember the blazing campfires,
The sparkling waters too,
For you belong to Heart O’ the Hills,
And Heart O’ the Hills belongs to you,
Remember….

Chicken and Dumplings

Chicken and Dumplings...

I made a big pot of chicken and dumplings today. I had been home sick for a couple of days and already eaten all of my favorite comfort foods… stew, taco soup, mashed potatoes and mac n cheese. So today it was chicken and dumplings my own made up creation. I’ll save that story for another time. Anyway the chicken was cooked and picked off the bone, it was simmering in the pot and as I began to make the dumplings I could almost hear Rachel reminding me to make extra (usually triple). And then she would ask are you sure that’s enough? Funny how even the littlest thing will make me think of her… She LOVED the dumplings… those types of memories are so bittersweet. I miss her sweet voice and her sweet hugs and the sweet way she called me momma or said Daaad when she knew he was kidding with her. I miss that smile… I miss the way she always said sleep sleep instead of sleep sweet. And muah at the end of a phone conversation. I write because there are so many things that I never want to forget. I want them in my heart forever…

one of my favorite places to be...

one of my favorite places to be...

Next weekend I am going to camp... Heart of the Hills camp for Girls... I went there every summer for a month from 1975-1985, it holds a VERY special place in my heart!

Another one of those hurdles, a whole new set of people that I knew and loved
that want to love on me since Rachel's death, it's gonna be hard... However, I will be sitting around the campfire singing songs, singing in the dining hall, staying up late with the girls talking, swimming in the river, riding horses and maybe even competing in a canoe race. I haven't decided on that one yet... it's 10 "girls" in a canoe racing... we'll see how the horse treats me. Just like when I was a little girl preparing to go, I got a new sleeping bag and it's cute (pink cammo)! On Sunday we have church school overlooking the Guadalupe River. Next to church it is my favorite place to be on a Sunday morning. The worship is awesome, just experiencing His creation and the beauty of it AMAZING!!!

they retired her jersey...